Kirk's Secret
by FanFictionWriter4077
Summary: Trying to find love on the Enterprise is not always easy.


** I do not own Star Trek

The captain is always the loneliest person on a starship and Kirk was no exception. For all the talk about his sexual prowess that went on within the crew, he was actually not getting any. Sure there were the women that they encountered on their various adventures in space but honestly those were just kisses to random women. Of course he also had his relationship with Spock and Bones and they were the best friends he could ever hope for. The problem is that the best friends in the world don't make up for a person to share your life with, someone you could start a family with. That was Kirk's secret. A long term committed relationship is something that Jim Kirk had never been in. And deep down under his flirting, smirking, devil may care exterior Kirk wanted that relationship more than anything. He often fantasized what it would be like to have someone he could share the day's events with, wake up with, have morning coffee, and not to mention the regular sex that any relationship with Kirk would involve.

He was secretly jealous of the other crew members and the carefree way they went about dating each other. Since he outranked everyone it was impossible for him to have an open relationship with another crewmember. Which only left him with the option of having secret affairs, and what woman would want to keep their relationship secret while simultaneously risking their careers if they were caught?

Of course Kirk had been tempted in the past to throw caution to the wind and pursue a woman under his command, although no one knew of it. Janice Rand, he knew he was in trouble the first time she made him coffee. Kirk was not a morning person and he loved, no needed his coffee to make him the loveable person he is in the morning. Janice had been on board a week as his new Yeoman when his morning coffee suddenly changed to the most delicious thing he had ever tasted. When he inquired after the change Janice told him that she did hot like the replicator coffee and so she had decided to brew the morning coffee herself from her favorite ground beans. Kirk was infatuated right then. The days passed and Kirk and Janice worked well together. Kirk admired her for her attention to detail and her apparent dedication to Starfleet. He also admired how she smelled, the way she smiled, and the way she filled out her uniform. Soon he was thinking about her out of the uniform, in his bed, and making coffee in the morning.

Kirk fought his desire for Janice, knowing it would be wrong to get involved with her, but when it came down to it he lost the battle. It happened after an away mission gone wrong. Janice had almost died in front of his eyes. Their mission had taken a turn for the worse and Janice was held hostage with a knife at her throat by some backworld alien thug with ridiculous demands. As Kirk tried to negotiate him down the alien grew more erratic and seemed like he would make good on his threat to kill Janice. Kirks heart froze and his breath stopped as the aliens hand drew back before making the killing slice to her throat. In the next instant the alien was on the ground, taken out by Spock who had snuck up from behind and delivered an effective Vulcan nerve pinch. Janice fainted and Kirk dashed forward and caught her right before she hit the ground and had all of them beamed up to the ship immediately.

After what seemed like hours but was only minutes McCoy cleared them both from sickbay and Kirk took Janice back to her quarters. Once in the privacy of her room Janice started to cry and Kirk hated to see women cry, his heart broke looking at her with her hair all disheveled and her uniform torn at the collar. All of this aside she still looked so beautiful to Kirk that his heart felt like it would burst into flame with unrequited passion. Was this love? Did she feel the same? The longing in her eyes and her body moving closer to him made him think she did.

Kirk, being a man of action stopped thinking about it and pulled her in, wrapping her in his strong arms and kissed her. It was like that first kiss opened a floodgate. They fell upon each other like people possessed and their lovemaking was ultimately wonderful. Janice felt perfect and right in his arms as they lay quietly together and Kirk secretly let himself hope that Janice would be the one that would end his loneliness.

A/N – I am working my way up to the Kirk/Uhura. Well trying at least. I need Kirk het fics and I am being forced to write my own because I cannot find more to read. =)

I wish there were more Kirk het fics!


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